Apologies for the depressing, stressed entry from yesterday. :) I took my last midterm today (Wellness)... Honestly, I think I probably got a C, which is terrible. I was not in the least prepared. Why the heck were we supposed to remember how many calories a pound of fat equals?!

I also turned in my Teaching paper... We were supposed to write 3-5 pages. I got not quite 2. Agh... I am NOT looking forward to my grade on that. I'd almost rather have not turned it in at all... :(

Oh, right, I wasn't going to rant anymore about midterms, etc. :P

Um... On a lighter note... The grass IS getting greener, it hasn't rained and isn't supposed to until Sunday, it's near 70� and outside they are playing Ultimate Frisbee. :) And guess what? I rediscovered the trigger to my imagination today.

Just for the heck of it, and since Rebekah was out of the room, I put on my crown today. I have a crown from my... 17th?... birthday party in my room, and today I just felt like putting it on for a moment. :) I also picked up the light-up "magic wand" my mother gave me for Christmas last year as a stocking stuffer (random...), and pranced around the room pretending to be a princess giving orders to her servants. I've done stuff like that before; it always only lasts a few short moments because I no longer have the imagination that I had as a kid.

I went over by the mirror and saw as I lifted the wand that the light sparkled over the crown and it looked really cool. Those are the kinds of things I loved as a kid, and today I still love sparkly things! C'est moi. J'adore les choses scintillants et luisants. Anyway... I walked back to my bed and sat down, thinking of the way the crown sparkled in the mirror, and then it hit me. I heard the voice of myself as a child saying excitedly, "Pretend that this crown is invisible until you pull the wand over it! See how it shimmers and you can just see it where the light hits it?"

Pretend that... That was the key! It wasn't, "I imagine," or just "Imagine..."--I guess kids don't know the word "imagine"--it was pretend that...

I stared around my room and it was as if I was looking through completely different eyes. Much younger eyes! The brick walls of the room--the sunlight coming through the glass window--Pretend that I am in a tower locked high above the ground, with only the window to look out of!

That was it. I felt the old secrets of childhood imagination leap back into my brain. Where had it come from? I thought I'd lost it long ago!

I looked around the room, continuing to see things through these new, yet old, eyes. I saw the poster of a rose above my bed. Pretend that that rose is a magic looking glass! It certainly looked like one when I saw it that way!

I saw the little stuffed bunny my Grandma sent me that I hadn't thought much of before. Pretend that that little bunny is my friend and my spy, who will help me find a way out of this tower!

I looked at the very thing I was laying on, and it wasn't just a bed anymore. Pretend that my pink and purple sheets are made of silk and satin!

My wardrobe... Huge and full of beautiful clothes and that I could duck into and hide. Perhaps even a magic door behind them...?

The very carpet of the room... A rich, soft rug covering the cold cement floor.

A very old book on my desk... A book of (good) magical spells.

The completely engaged set of mind I was in eventually faded, but the excitement of discovering a way to run back into the imagination of my childhood remained. Even... LOL... As I went into the bathroom. I was disappointed that I could open the door so easily (princesses locked in rooms at the tops of towers aren't supposed to get out so easily), but when I entered the bathroom, new revelations hit me. The bathroom itself was the witch's (the one who kept me locked up) lair, and the baskets of shampoos and conditioners on top of the shelves were potions of all sorts that she created. I saw the stalls and a new idea came to me. Perhaps the tower's (or castle's) dungeon! And each stall a prison cell.

All sorts of things came to life. I felt just like Sara in A Little Princess, who imagined away all her troubles. She was good at it! Of course, she was only 10. I was 10 nearly 10 years ago!

Anyway... Gosh, it was fun! I have to apologize to the people out there (girls and guys both) whose imaginations did not consist of princesses locked up in towers and talking creatures and stuff, but that's a little dip into my old imagination for you. :) That's what I thrived on... I still thrive on those things, if you can't tell by the rainbow-colored butterflies and unicorns in a secret forest on the walls of my room! :D

It may be silly, but I can't tell you how glad I am to have finally reached back to my imagination days. I could start writing stories again... That would be cool. Maybe I could become an author for children's books. I always thought of doing that in my story-writing days... In my diary days I thought of publishing my journals someday (when the stuff in them isn't half so embarrassing anymore, LOL!). I guess I've always dreamed of writing a story and having it published. I don't think I'm good enough... But it's one of those lifetime goals I can add to my list. :)

Now, back to the present. I've got to run to dinner... The Dex closes in 20 minutes!! LOL.

-Stephanie

previous || next

Miss Something?

Social Anxiety with Guys - February 07, 2024

Education Expo with an ADHD Kid - February 03, 2024

Lovely Church Experience - October 22, 2023

Seek Out Community in Christ - August 29, 2023

Grieving Lost Friendships - May 08, 2023