I just don't even know how to process all this. I'm waiting on Book 4 of the Katie Weldon, but Book 3 ended on a pretty conclusive note. And I don't know why but I can't stop feeling like I'm on the edge of tears or something. It wasn't as if it were sad, and yet...

It was just so...something. To watch Katie's life pan out that way. I guess it's been a while since I felt this deeply about books. Hence all the prolific journal entries of late, LOL.

I wish my husband understood.

I guess that's why my heart feels like it's breaking. I just finished this phenomenal experience and I have no one to share it with who will quite understand. I love my husband so much, but there are some depths of a woman's heart a man can't ever quite reach.

I had it in my head that once we got married, he'd understand those depths, or at least begin to. But maybe men just simply aren't made that way. At least not my man. Maybe there are some Todds out there who think on a super deep emotional level, but that's not the kind I married.

I don't want anybody (especially my love, if he were to ever read this!!) to think I love him any less for that. It's just a reminder, maybe, that no human can't truly complete you. Only God can do that fully. At least God understands the depths of emotion I feel right now.

Wow, that is more comforting than I thought it would be.

A God who created emotions this deep understands them, too.

Don't get caught up in the idea that any one human being can complete you. No matter what books make you feel. There is only one Being who can do that, and He isn't contained within the pages of a Christian fiction romance. There's another Book to go to about that. :)

I wish I knew somebody amongst my local friends that I could go to right now with all this emotion I'm feeling right now. But I don't have any Christy friends. I'm glad I have this journal, though. This is a good place to come back to myself, and be reminded that God still completes me.

I think I'll go use my regular prayer journal now.

-Stephanie

*smile* And that's why I buy this kind of journal. I just bought a new one (after not having one for WAY too long), and the writing on the first page says "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change." Man, God really does love me.

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