Trust. Where is my trust? Trust is the way you get answers from the Lord.

Remember the Europe trip that got cancelled? Well, now I am wondering if I should go to New York instead... This year during Spring Break there's a team of people going to inner-city New York. They will also be seeing a Broadway show... And those of you that know me... I love musicals. So that's really, really tempting. And the fact that I'd like to have my life changed a little, to get out of this complacent spot I've come to in my life.

But making big decisions is always hard for me. The money... Not worried about it. If God wants me to go, He'll provide.

The thing is, I don't know if God wants me to go. Doubt and faith... Someone told me once that one never comes without the other. Well, whenever I ask, "What does God say?" they immediately commence furious battle. It used to be, God's voice? I don't know what God's voice sounds like. All I ever hear in my head is my own voice, and that's more often feelings than faith. And then I'm so indecisive I never know what I think.

Now I do know what God's voice sounds like: a quiet conviction. Peace instead of the usual tumult of the heart. But I'm always worried about time. God, speak to me already, goes the conversation. I only have this many days to decide!

I haven't got the quiet conviction about this trip to New York yet. But I do want to go... It's just committing to it that's difficult thing.

I haven't prayed yet, though, except just two minutes ago, as I filled out the application. So anyway... Pray with me, friends; pray that God will convict me either way, because I want to go, but I want to be sure I should go. I want to be certain that it's the right thing to do.

Hey... A Bible verse just came to mind. I didn't even conjure it up. (That, too, is a way of God speaking to you.)

Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.

Jeremiah 29:12-14

I am seeking God with all my heart.

That means I will find Him.

'Tis a comfort.

-Stephanie

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