I guess I should update this every once in a while. :) Well, in short, I'm really happy. In long, the first few days of this week were horrible. Stress, homework, stress, homework, stress. But I got to talk to Stephen last night (by the way, yes, Stephen is who I am going out with now) last night and oh my goodness. I felt so much better after talking to him. I really really really needed to just hear his voice and talk to him.

Okay, I was using fancy font because I was letting myself be extremely romantic and daydreamy. Now to the practical, realistic stuff. :)

Steve and I are still trying to figure a few things out. After we first "officially" became a couple, he called me every day and I literally started to get tired of talking to him. :Z Because we talk for 2 hours every time we talk, and I just can't talk that much. It wears me out. So I told him that we shouldn't talk every day... So this was Saturday/Sunday we were talking and we said he would call Wednesday (yesterday). And then I had really cruddy stressful days and I really wished we had said Tuesday instead.

Doing this long-distance is interesting. I really think it's working well for me. When I was going out with Nate, we were in the same town, went to the same school, etc. etc. And, being young and very stupid, we figured we needed to spend every minute of our spare time together. The result was that we got sick of each other but felt obligated to still keep spending all that time together. Yuck.

We also took things too fast. Way too fast--particularly emotionally. When you talk to each other for extended amounts of time every single day, you run out of the silly, everyday stuff to say, and your conversations turn deep. Nate and I were both serious, deep-thinking types to begin with, so we were telling each other our deepest secrets and fears... And that just isn't healthy. We were only going out for three months. Some of the stuff we were telling each other most couples wouldn't talk about till they'd been together for, like, a year.

I didn't tell Steve all that, but I did request that we not talk every day. But once a week is probably not enough. I don't know... I've never done long-distance before, this is all so new.

But I love that it's forcing us to take things slowly. I feel like this is right, I feel like this is the way things should work.

The fact that Steve is 5 years older than me adds another interesting dimension and dynamic to our relationship. He's already established at a job, has his own apartment, etc., and I'm not even graduated from college yet and not even sure who I am or what I want to do with the rest of my life.

Steve has actually only been out of college for a year and a half, by the way. He took a year off of school before going to college, and then he went to a community college, and then he switched to a 4-year college. He majored in...hang on, let me see if I can get this right...Informational Technology. LOL. NNU doesn't have anything quite like that; we have Computer Science and that's it, so it's a bit difficult for me to remember. He works with a place called...MetroGraphics, I think. And I forget what his official title is, but he helps people when they have computer problems--and he does a whole long list of other things too. Anyway. My point was, he hasn't been on his own for THAT long, so we're not at extremely different places in that respect.

Another interesting (forgive me for the overuse of that far-too-common adjective) thing I've been trying to get used to is that he is such a plan-ahead type guy. I am so not a plan-ahead type girl! No, I have not been planning my wedding since I was 10. No, I do not know what I'm going to do with my life after college. I don't even know what I'm going to do next weekend! I take life as it comes. So Steve and I differ very much there. We also differ in our sense of humor... He has a cheesy sense of humor, and his jokes make me groan more than they make me laugh, LOL, but I think he's used to that. :) My sense of humor is...something different, but I don't know what you call it. Dry humor but also random, unexpected humor, as my friend Isaac would know, haha! Electric green? What? :D Anyway... So Steve and I definitely have our differences, but we go together so well somehow. At least I feel we do. I think he does too.

That actually just astonishes me, the way we go so well together. Ever since we went on that date, or even further back... For one thing, he's just got this huge sense of protectiveness. And it's perfect, because one of the things I need badly in any relationship is to feel protected. I don't think I realized how much I need/want that till I met him.

Nate and he are very similar in that they are both very protective of any female they build a relationship with (romantic or not). In some ways, in fact, I think when Nate gets to be 26, if he makes the right choices, he could be a lot like Steve. That sounds kind of weird, doesn't it? Like I'm dating an older, way more mature version of Nate. But there are enough differences between them, in spite of their similarities, that I can date Steve, and I can't date Nate.

At any rate... I guess I'll just say one more thing.

Something I said to Stephen kind of sums up how I feel overall about this relationship. We were talking about the night we got lost--after he took me to the Crystal Ballroom--and all the fun and funny memories from that night. I don't remember what prompted me to say this, but I said, "It was so...easy to be lost with you." And that's how I feel about the whole relationship. It's so easy to be with him.

I'm probably being completely and utterly romantic and sappy, but give me a little credit. :) My last relationship wasn't nearly as awesome as this one's been so far.

I know Steve considers me a "serious" girlfriend. I guess I consider him a "serious" boyfriend too. Just 'cause I'm at the age where dating probably should be headed in the direction of marriage and, as he said it about Melanie and Aaron, "[at this age] you know what you want." I am certainly finding out what I want with him, LOL.

It's too early to begin talking too seriously, especially for me, little commitment-phobic me, LOL... But when it comes right down to it, I think we feel kind of the same way: This could be something really good. We've just gotta keep our heads and hearts in the right place, keeping God first in whatever we do.

So yeah....Happiness. :) Now it's off to a progressive dinner for me, and then I get to write my articles for the Crusader that are due tomorrow at noon. Oh yeah, and I have homework to do that won't be too difficult, yay. Yay for my stupid, insane, stressful week calming down and being happier. :) Have a good evening, all.

-Stephanie

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