I did mention my friend Beth (from the Beth and Justin drama) was engaged, right?

I haven't mentioned yet that my great-grandmother passed away January 9. My mom, sister and I traveled home for her memorial service this last weekend. Since I was in town, I arranged a get-together with Beth too.

When it's people I care a lot about, who have been a big part of my life, I MUST see them in person to talk about them being engaged. Particularly Beth-eth. I'll also want to see Brooke and Molly when/if they get engaged, if they're under 25 (the three of them are currently 20-21).

So I met with Beth on Sunday. And I didn't see what I wanted to see. She didn't have that sparkle in her eye--her love for Gallo didn't show when she wasn't trying. Maybe that's a stupid thing to want to see in engaged people. Maybe romance should have nothing to do with the lifelong commitment of marriage.

Yeah right. You know I don't believe that for a second.

The second thing that worries me a smidge is that they aren't getting married until 2010. That's next year now, so it makes it a little less scary--I don't think, "Two years into the future?!! Are you serious?!!" But it sounds an awfully long ways away. Plus, they're not sure of the date yet. She wants to get married in September, he wants to get married in July.

Anyway. So I'm a little concerned about her. I guess we'll just see.

I hate that.

I think I need another lesson in patience and waiting and trust...

That all said, onto my weekend in my hometown. It was a good and hard weekend. It was great to be back in my hometown and visit all the familiar places. It was great to see my family and church family again. I love them all SO much.

What was hard was looking at aging and the passing of years. I saw a lot of relatives I hadn't seen in years, and a lot of church members that I grew up around. I saw faces that I faintly recognized surrounded by white or gray hair that I remembered being much darker. When did these people grow old? I wondered. Words from "Sunrise, Sunset" drifted through my head.

Sunday night my grandparents, mom, sister and I watched a video of Christmas 1989. I was 3 years old, Sam was 2. So many of my relatives in that movie have passed away now--both of my great-grandfathers (one of them only two years later) and my great-grandmothers and one of my great-uncles. It was crazy seeing them alive again, caught on videotape. And I kept looking at myself, wondering what in the world was going on in that little head of mine way back then. Way before seventh grade, high school, my first relationship, NNU, getting married, and all of the other things that have left marks on my life since then. And suddenly I think I understand songs like "Butterfly Kisses" and "Cinderella" a little more now.

I guess I don't really have any conclusions to draw. Just a reflecting spirit to share.

-Stephanie

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