It's a providential thing that I wrote the Bible verse, "And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus" (Philippians 4:19) in my Facebook status yesterday. It was sitting there staring at me when I got back from the dentist today, ready to cry, having learned that I will not need one (as I originally thought), but two root canal re-treatments next year.

But despite the Bible verse and promise, it worries me. Next year is going to be extra tight, because my school loan will no longer be on deferment. Our monthly payment on it will now be double and a half what we were paying for the last 2 years. When you're scraping by, that's a scary thought.

The last two years, we've wiped out all of my insurance benefits and all our savings account every year, with double root canals and double crowns each year.

Thankfully, this next year will not be quite as drastic. One of my teeth that needs a re-treatment already has a crown on it, and they will probably just drill a hole through the crown and root canal it that way, like they did with one other tooth. Also, these are re-treatments. I believe they are slightly cheaper, since the roots have already been removed, and all they'll be doing is taking out the sealant, washing out the bacteria, and resealing it.

This also means that the procedures will be shorter, thank God. They're pretty traumatizing when you've had 7 or 8 done, and the thought of spending another 6-8 hours at the dentist's office (3-4 per tooth) so does not appeal to me at all.

Sometimes I wish they could just knock me out for the procedures. I've had so many done. But there isn't any real reason to.

I just don't want to go through this again and I know I'm going to cry at the dentist's office again.

Our consultation appointment with the endodontist is not until January 3rd, as we didn't want to make any more until our benefits were full again. (Thank God we have anything at all.) Unfortunately, #15, the root canal re-treatment we already knew about, is aggravated after the appointment today. I swear it wasn't giving me much trouble until Dr. F rapped on it today to test it. It's been achy ever since.

It was giving me some trouble, though. I thought that it was just my jaw being achy when I forgot my bite at night. But it's definitely that tooth hurting.

One thing that worries me about that tooth is that it hurts, without a root being there. I can't help but wonder what is hurting if the nerves are gone. I sure hope it's just any nerves in the area of my mouth where the infection is.

So anyway....I guess that about sums up my troubles. This is definitely my bona fide thorn in the flesh. O God, give me faith that you'll heal me, or strength if you don't.

-Stephanie

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