That could've been so much more fun if I hadn't gotten so control freakish about it.

Dear Diary,

There are things that you never discover about yourself until you are in a certain situation. For years, I've been without people contact. You get to thinking you're pretty okay just the way you are when you don't have to deal with people. It is only in relationships that you realize where your rough edges that need smoothing are. It is only when you hurt somebody that you realize you are capable of hurting. This is why God designed us for relationships.

I'm super not excited about this. I don't want to hurt anybody. But I don't want to jip myself out of a valuable lesson, either.

You know, this would be easier if I could learn to apologize.

I guess that's what God really puts us in relationship for: to learn that we need to apologize for our actions. To keep our hearts soft and malleable. To keep us humbly aware of our shortcomings. To remind us why we need Christ in the first place.

STILL SO NOT EXCITED ABOUT THIS.

:(

Okay, here we go. Lord, I'm here.

Love,
Stephanie

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