Now I don't know whether to write happy stuff or... not-so-happy stuff. I don't really want to write the not-so-happy stuff. But it's big news. So I'll just do both, shortly. Yesterday I had a GREAT day! In jazz choir, half the class went out and played Frisbee... Including Logan. :D Here's the shortened version: he threw it to me 3 times, and I made one miraculous throw that was completely NOT aiming for him, but it went straight to him.

I didn't throw to him more often because there was a big TREE blocking him from my position. I wasn't sure I wanted to make the extra effort to step out, face him, and throw it to him... I was afraid it would be a little obvious.... But he made the extra effort to throw to ME--three times, no less!--so now I'm all mixed up! Did he do that because he wanted to be fair to everyone, or was there anything in that? I'm inclined to believe he was just being fair to everyone--he's that type of guy--but I do wonder.

Well... Now I guess I had better write the not-so-good stuff... I'm going to make this real short....

Today at school a kid was found lying, awake but not responding, on the floor of one of the boys' bathrooms. His wrists were slit.

He was taken to the hospital, and I haven't heard anything more. It's a huge shock... I've been crying off and on. Sometimes it feels like there's some really heavy pressure on my chest, which makes it difficult to take deep breaths. But I calm myself down eventually. Turn my mind away. I don't want to think about it. I just pray hard.

I didn't even know the guy, I just knew sort of who he was. He's pretty well-known around the school. I don't know about popular. Just unique.

I hope he lives. I hope it with every ounce of hope in me. But I'm so, so scared....

-Stephanie

Later: The stupid "database is loaded up," so I guess I'll add on to this.

I talked to my mom and my sister about the boy. Their responses made me really mad--particularly Mom's. Mom said, almost with a sniff, "That hardly ever works anyway. Most kids who do it that way just want attention." It made me so angry. How can she be so desensitized to something like this?? Oh, yeah, he just wanted attention, that's it. I'm sure the only thought he had just before he wielded the knife--or whatever it was--was The bright red color will surely attract some attention! I'll just let myself bleed a while and wait for someone to come get me.

...I guess maybe it might've been something like that, actually. Maybe he was thinking, If I do this then they'll pay attention to me. But just the way Mom said it... As if slitting your wrists was the most immature thing to do in the world. How could you be that calloused to something so horrific? I don't understand it.

I sent out an e-mail to a bunch of people in our youth group to pray in this situation. Maybe whoever's reading this, if you're the praying type, or even if you're not, could do the same. Thanks.