Woke up this morning ready to write to my great aunt again in a kinder way. Lo and behold, she had written back to me.

She responded about how I expected her to, about how my family always reacts to any touchy subject: very passive aggressively. Sigh. But I wrote her a letter back that I think actually did a very good job of defending my boundaries and still being kind to her. Yay! That never happens!!! God must be doing work on me. <3

I wrote:

"I wanted to say I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings for even having to ask. And I wanted to give you some background to explain why I reacted like I did.

"The truth is, this week has not been a smiling week at all. It's been a very difficult, emotional week, and it has been related to baby. Although it is actually due to my father, who, as you know, has not been a part of my life, and, as you may not know, is a very, very hard person to deal with. Because of him this week, I've spent the days alternating between crying, and trying very hard to grasp on to what in my life is positive. And while I understand that having a child is not an easy thing, I also have heard that it is one of the most joy-bringing things God can place in a person's life. So in the middle of the mess, I'm trying to remember that. That's why your posts about the discouraging aspect of having children have been 'hot buttons' for me lately.

"That said, I do, in fact, prefer people to be encouraging on my Facebook page instead of discouraging as a general rule. I heard a quote once: "Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a fierce battle." I have made that a rule for my life and for my page, as I know how true it is. So I hope that you can be sensitive to my feelings on that part. Again, I am sorry I have had to bring this up at the cost of hurting your feelings. I hope you understand better now, and can forgive me.

"Thank you,
Stephanie"

So that's that. We'll see how it goes. I'm going to be on pins and needles until it's over. But right now I really need to go take a shower and eat something. I'm meeting Heidi in a little over an hour--first time in ages!!! I'm so excited to see her again.

-Stephanie

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